I blame it on Lonely Planet.
I was solo traveling when I grabbed that city guidebook and sat down next to the handsome Italian in the hostel common room. If it hadn’t been for Lonely Planet I might have never gotten involved beyond a cursory glance and passing smile; yet, I did get involved and as is the case with travel in general, I let myself drink the Kool-aid of a romance found on the road.
We’ve all been there. That serendipitous encounter. That heady high of meeting someone abroad and the feeling that you’ve found a kindred spirit who loves to travel as much as you do; not realizing that you could swing a bag and knock over ten other like-minded travelers in the vicinity.
You become enamored by how similar you and a stranger can be. As you discuss food, travel, and dreams, you let yourself run away with irrational thoughts: “He is a foodie? I’m a foodie! It must be fate.”
All of a sudden rationale goes out the window as the mix of a foreign land, a charming stranger, a rolling accent and instant chemistry blend together like a cocktail you’ll love now and lament later.
When reality rears its ugly head and inevitably puts miles between you two, you’ll thrill at the romantic possibilities of one day running into each other again. It plays out like a movie reel in your mind. The two of you crossing paths at a surf camp in Bali. Perhaps bumping into each other at a market in Marrakesh because if life brought you together it must be for a reason, no?
>Back home, the gentle ping of Whatsapp messages becomes your favorite sound and the melodic ring of a Skype call starts to sound like a symphony. You learn the time difference between you two as you video chat for hours, thrill at his flirtation and swap grandiose plans of one day seeing each other. His sweet words pour out like honey on your phone taking your guard down with it and letting you believe there just might be something there.
Like Harold and his purple crayon, you let yourself draw up a fantasy – a version of this story where you can simply date and revel in that instant connection so effortlessly enjoyed abroad. As conversations inevitably slow, you find just how quickly the curtain will fall on the story of a romance that never made it on stage.
The deafening silence of Whatsapp will haunt you, the miles between you will frustrate you (when will they invent instant teleportation already!?) and the memories will tug at your heart as you replay them and wonder what might have been.
A day will go by and then five. Eventually, you’ll stop checking Whatsapp and will realize that he was no more and no less than a beautiful mirage.
You’ll walk away feeling ambivalent. Nostalgic for someone you barely know, happy for having met him, irrevocably hopeful to keep in touch. Then just like the day, you kissed that brown-eyed stranger goodbye; you’ll hoist your bag on your shoulder, lift your chin up and keep on walking; because you know your adventure is only just beginning.
Have you ever fallen for someone while solo traveling? Share your solo travel stories in the comments section below!
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Kathi Ka says
When will they invent instant teleportation already!? That’s what I keep asking myself when I think of that certain someone I met on the road and just can’t get out of my head…
I honestly think about instant teleportation every time I’m:
-running late for something
-boarding a long flight
-missing someone
and pretty much any instance where I wish I could just get to where I want to be in a second! 🙂
Elske says
Haha instant teleportation would be awesome, no more long haul flights!
But finding true love on the road is also possible when you are lucky. I met My fiance 3,5 years ago while traveling solo in Nepal! Lucky for me he lived in the same country as me, so no long distance relation ship for us.
Claire says
I live in London but am originally from New Zealand the teleportation thing is a factor whenever I’m missing home…my boyfriend is English so there’s no problems there haha.
Zoe says
It seems that traveling goes perfectly with romance. I had the most intense love story with a solo traveler. He was on the road for some months. We were each other’s soulmate. We couldnt believe how lucky we were to meet! After some “I cant live without you insomnia months” I visited him to the other side of the world where he was staying. He was a stranger 🙁 I guess when you travel you are more “vulnerable” to love…
Liza says
I was traveling solo to Bali a couple months ago just to surf and to find new friends, but instead I met someone that is worth more than a friend. I never thought my friend’s silly chick flick fantasy that me meeting a hot surfer in the water while surfing would come to reality. We finally dated for three whole days before he left for his country, but we continued texting for a few weeks until I decided to refuse his idea to meet up in Phuket and we stop contacting each other. I just thought it was a holiday fling so i don’t want to mix it with real life.
Melvyn says
i met a french guy unexpectedly on an island in Thailand who hesitated at the beginning but agreed to show me around by motorbike as I cant ride one. On the same evening, we bummed into each other again at my hostel and started hanging out since. He even asked me to hold onto him on the bike, grabbing him from the back and since then, I guessed we started flirting with each other. But suddenly, I was uncomfortable with what’s going on. Our last time together was cold and awkward. What’s worst was learning that he likes me and wanted to kiss me but knowing that I was only 19 and he was 35, he didn’t try. We did managed to keep in contact for a while and suddenly he stopped responding to my mail. Twice, I tried to reconnect with him, never will anymore and he would say that his schedule is out of place since he quit his job, so he’s unable to respond regularly. I really wonder is it that difficult to send an email? Maybe he just don’t dare to tell me directly that he’s annoyed by me or that what happened in Thailand stays in Thailand.
Frenchieontheroad says
I fell for a Czech boy while visiting Prague. We were fond of each other and decided to build a serious relationship even though I had to go home. We stayed in touch. We wrote beautiful letters to each other. I came back for a few days just before going back to uni. And then, out of sight out of mind… He stopped answering my texts. Yes, as you said, he was just a beautiful mirage.
koolaidcosmo says
That ending sentence made my day “…because you know your adventure is only just beginning”
: D Thank you stranger!
Anna says
Just yes to every word. I loved this post. I feel like my life is a string of these travel romances that I imagine will turn into something more. You would think I would learn…maybe one day.